Tuesday, November 27, 2007

GIfts To Leave Off Your Lists

*King Edward VII had a golf bag that was given to him that was made out of an elephant's penis. Something tells me this is not the ideal gift for the golfer in your life.

*Pills made from the toxic metal antimony were highly esteemed in medieval times as bowl regulators. The pills irritated the intestinal tract, causing diarrhea, and would pass through the body unharmed, so they could be handed down from father to son and mother to daughter as precious family heirlooms. Ew! Ew ew ew ew!

*Pope Pius IX gave Queen Isabel of Spain the embalmed corpse of St. Felix for her birthday. Nothing says Happy Birthday - here's to another great year! quite like the embalmed corpse of a saint.

*The 1897 Sears, Roebuck & Company mail-order catalog offered a selection of hypodermic syringe kits for shooting up heroin. Well it is always nice to give people something that they have a use for...

*Moulay Ismael, the sultan of Morocco, gave samples of his bowel movements to ladies to the court as a mark of special favor. I'm not sure what 'special favor' it was supposed to mark, but I would be fine just being a plain old lady of the court if I could avoid that gift!

So, what was the worst gift you ever received?!

*From 5 People Who Died During Sex by Karl Shaw.


nicrogers said...

I can't say for sure that any gift I have received has been truly awful, just that after numerous hints, lists, emails, detailed phone conversations, maps of the mall, etc. My husband still manages to NOT get me what I want. I don't quite know why but thats my cross....

Swistle said...

Any bad gift I've received PALES in comparison to those. But Paul has given me a present he already gave me. That is, he gives me a book, and then the next Christmas gives me a second copy of the same book. And that has happened more than once.